The Princess Brat And The Turkey Boy
by Nanyoky
Summary: Reffie. RenoXYuffie. New title! I turned this former oneshot into a series of oneshots... Because I've officially fallen in love with this pairing...
1. Intro

**Oh. Dear. Lord. How did I get myself into this? Honestly, I really need a good kick in the head. All I should be working on right now is my Clotif, and here I am, starting a Reffie Oneshot collection. Someone put me out of my misery because my beta is an enabler(JK smiles Deana)! Not that I don't love this pairing, but I really am not in need of any new projects! But I guess I'm like our favorite Turk in one way; I have an addictive personality. And now I'm completely addicted to writing reffie. I mean, at first, it was like; "Reffie? Hmm... that would get rid of the nasty taste of Yuffentine while adding in one of my favorite characters at the same time... maybe if I'm really bored it would be fun to play with for laughs." but now, I'm like "hhmmm... this would make the perfect reffie song fic!" every time i turn on the radio... So here you go sports fans, a new drabble series. Oh yeah, this fic used to be my first oneshot, but I decided to turn it into a series. The original oneshot is the first chapter, so if your a returning reader, just skip it.**

**Blanket Disclaimer: I own nothing that belongs to Square Enix, no matter how much I wish I had Cloud and Reno all to myself (Glomp! Mine!). The only thing I own is the insanity I get them into.**

**Rating: Oh come on, do you seriously think I'd be able to write anything with Reno and keep it under teen? But I really try hard to keep my writing clean, so no smut. But I will give warning if things get out of hand at the beggining of the chapter.**

**No flames. I know Reffie isn't very popular, but if you don't like it, don't read it. There will also most likely be suggested CloudXTifa, CidXShera, MarleneXDenzel (when they're older you sickos!) and ZackXAeris. But don't review just to say that you don't like any of those. Also, I've been experimenting with this pair so I'm sorry if they get really OOC later on.**


	2. I Don't Dance

**Reffie.**

**Okay, got all the Yuffentine fans out, now on to the fic! I haven't got much to say other than sorry to anyone who's waiting on updates for my other stories. And be aware, it's mildly suggestive cuz, duh, Reno. Need I say more? But i tried to keep it pretty clean cuz not a whole lot of people read the Mature fics. This is probably really weird, but I don't care. I got it stuck in my head (along with songs by the Black Eyed Peas) so brace yourselves! Oh yeah, and suggested Clotif.**

Finally Tifa gave in. A grimacing Cloud set up the brand new stereo system in one corner of the room. Yuffie bounced around; chattering to the both of them about how fun this was going to be and how they wouldn't regret buying it, not in a million years. She couldn't wait until that night. It was going to be the greatest thing that ever happened to the 7th Heaven, she just knew it. She spent all morning drawing up an elaborately decorative sign, advertising free shots all night to break in the new sound system.

"Who put this sign up?" Tifa asked, looking mildly annoyed.

"Me, I thought it would bring in more people for the party tonight."

"Yuffie, for the last time: It is _not_ a party," Tifa sighed. "We just got a stereo. It's no big deal."

"No big deal?" Yuffie gaped at her, her eyes bulging comically. "This is the greatest thing that's ever happened to us Teef! This is going to be the best night ever! I'm telling you, this will bring in a whole new crowd. You're always talking about getting fresh faces in here."

"Yuffie, I'm sorry but I can't hand out free drinks! It's just too expensive."

"Don't worry Teef," Yuffie was willing to do anything to get as many people in for that night as possible. "I'll cover everyone's drinks."

"Yuffie, we both know I can't let you do that."

"Oh yes you can! And you will! Just wait Teef, this place is goin to be jumpin!"

* * *

And she was right. At seven o'clock, the bar was already packed with customers, and the music hadn't even started. 

"Hey Baby! Bring us another would you Darlin?"

Cloud glared at the men calling out orders and looking Tifa up and down as she swerved skillfully through the mess of chairs and tables. His knuckles turned white on his glass as one man stared quite obviously at the bar maid's rear as she walked away.

"Calm down Strife, someone might think you're jealous." Yuffie slid into the seat across from him, making him jump.

"Huh?"

"Oh come on, I'm not blind." She rolled her eyes. The Chocobo Head was so dense. "Just so you know, you have to claim something as yours before you can get mad at people for trying to steal it."

"I dunno what you're talking about Brat."

"Oh shut up," she sighed. It was no use, she'd have to work her match making magic from the other end. She searched the room, picking out Tifa easily. "Hey Teef! When are we going to start the dancing?"

"What dancing?" Tifa ran a hand through her hair, it was getting hot in there with the extra bodies.

"What do you mean what dancing?!" Yuffie slapped her forehead. No wonder the relationship never lifted off the ground. "Why else would you buy a great stereo like that?"

"I don't know… background noise?"

"Teef, the whole point was to turn this dingy old bar into a hoppin club!"

"It was?"

"Yes! Now tell everyone to push the tables back so people can dance!"

"Fine… but no one's going to do it." Tifa sighed and cupped her hands around her mouth. "Alright! Apparently we're going to have a dance floor tonight. So if everyone would be so kind as to get all the tables against one wall, we can start the music!" There was general agreement as the deafening scraping of chairs filled the bar. "This better work Yuffie," Tifa sighed, collapsing onto a stool, shrugging off her suffocating leather vest and pulling her sweat soaked muscle shirt from her back with a sickening suction noise.

"It will, don't worry." Yuffie bent over the stereo, examining the dials. "How do you get radio on this?"

"Your guess is as good as mine," Tifa groaned, taking a small sip of whiskey.

Yuffie pressed a few buttons experimentally until blaring hip-hop made the windowpanes rattle.

"Got it!" she cried triumphantly. She looked up expectantly as though expecting everyone to get up and start dancing like in a teenager's musical. "What's everyone waiting for?"

A few people were nodding or smiling to a familiar song, but most just continued their conversations, albeit a little louder. Yuffie wilted visibly. She made her way dejectedly over to the bar, flopping down on the only empty stool.

"What's wrong Princess?"

She looked up, she hadn't even noticed Reno sitting there as well, drowning himself in hard liquor. But his eyes and voice was still steady, he couldn't have been there long.

"No one will dance… and I'm _so_ not going out there all by myself," she perked up slightly. "But you'll dance!"

"No I won't."

"Oh come on, you're a good dancer!"

"What makes you think that yo?" He shook his head, bemused. "I don't dance."

"You just are!" she rolled her eyes as though this was obvious. "I can tell. Certain people just walk a certain way and you walk like a dancer!"

"Are you callin me a queer?"

"No! Plenty of straight guys can dance," she huffed, giving up. She left him to his drink, pulling Tifa out of her stool. "Come on girl! I ain't goin out there alone."

"And I'm not going out there at all," Tifa retorted, using her superior muscle mass to drag herself back into her seat. "Just let it go Yuffie. If no one dances, no one dances. They just don't want to."

"That's not true at all! If one person starts, than everyone will want to!"

"I don't dance."

"Well then you'll learn," she dragged her out with difficulty. A few men wolf whistled at the two girls.

"Yuffie! What are you doing!?"

"Come on Teef, don't pretend you've never danced with your friends before."

"I'm not pretending! I told you, I don't dance! As in at all. In any way. Besides, I know this song, it's filthy."

"That's kinda the idea Teef," she started dancing. Yuffie loved to dance. It was one thing that she wasn't clumsy and uncoordinated at. It was just one of those things that clicked. "This is the only kind of music that you should dance to. You've got to be able to feel the bass in your stomach, your legs, your boobs, everywhere!" She was moving fluidly to the music, making more than one jaw drop. "You just have to let it take you away, like, I dunno, electricity or a river current or something." Yuffie was right about something else. Now that they were standing on the dance floor, a few other people were joining them, alone or in pairs. "See? Told you! No one will notice if you let your hair down for once and have a good time, I promise! Just try it!"

Tifa sighed, trying to copy a few of the younger girl's cleaner moves. As time passed, she grew more confident, letting her natural grace take over.

"Look how good you are!" Yuffie beamed. She loved watching people come out of their shells. She grinned, hearing the next song coming on, 'Disco Club.' Tifa was just going to die. And she thought the last song was dirty! But that was just a part of dancing, making the smutty lyrics into something hot and sexy on the dance floor.

She dropped down and sprung back up almost instantly and was surprised to feel an arm wrap around her waist and a hand spread across her stomach, moving in perfect time with her. She didn't question it, but kept moving to the rhythm, maybe leaning a little closer to her unknown partner than she would normally. The hand spun her around and she raised an eyebrow at Reno. He smirked, his hands sliding along her hips.

"I thought you didn't dance."

"Hell girl," he grinned, not missing a beat. "This ain't dancin yo," he spun her around again, holding her much closer than was necessary to still speak into her ear. "This, my Brat, is sex with clothes on. And that is one thing I _can_ do."

She rammed her elbow into his stomach and stamped on his foot, getting a satisfying cough out of him. But she was glad she wasn't facing him so he could see her try not to smile. He definitely had a sense of humor. She stuck her lip out in a pout, trying to keep up with him, both in their dancing and in their banter that usually ended in Yuffie smacking him and stalking away. "I thought I was a Princess." She whined.

"You're the Princess of the Brats babe," he mumbled, his lips tickling her ear, sending a shiver through her.

He whipped her around to face him again, somehow keeping her just as close. They moved in perfect rhythm. Every step she took forward was accompanied by a step back, making Yuffie feel like they were attached at the ankles. She loosened up, letting her limbs take on a mind of their own instead of keeping them in check as she usually did with a partner. It was almost like fighting. Every twist and sway was a new attack that she threw at him and every move he made in response was a dodge or counter attack. If they really were fighting, she wasn't quite sure who would be winning. It was funny how much her mind wondered during this. She started thinking of the dance as a sparring match, making her moves more complex and involved, trying to make him slip up. But he never did.

"Getting tired?"

"Not on your life," she panted. Of coarse she was tired. Her breath was ragged and she could feel sweat running down her back and forehead. Reno on the other hand looked fine, not even a drop of sweat marring his face. She had to concentrate hard on dancing when she was looking into those hypnotic emerald eyes. "Aren't you hot?" she ran her hands along his shoulders under the pretenses of feeling the thick wool jacket he still wore.

"Why yes I am, and you don't look too bad yourself yo."

"You know what I mean Turk."

"Really?" he raised his eyebrows at her. "I'm not sure I catch your drift."

She glared at him. He was so infuriating. "I mean isn't it kind of warm in here to be wearing that Goddamn uniform?"

"Naw, it ain't that hot," he slid his arms around her waist, holding her even closer. "Not yet yo."

She frowned at him. What was with him? Was she finally seeing the side of him that got so many women sighing and wanting more? Or was he just drunk as hell? If so, she had to say he was even hotter when drunk. Not that she had never caught herself checking him out before.

Finally, the song ended and Yuffie's temper flared. She hated this song. She tried to convince herself that that was the reason she was so angry and it wasn't because they had stopped dancing.

"Thanks Princess," he smirked, planting a soft kiss on her lips.

Yuffie stood rooted to the spot and watched him walk away back to the bar. What was that? But she huffed in frustration. Sure she was tired, but she never wanted to stop dancing. Now she had lost the intoxicating beat that had possessed her while with him. She sighed, sitting down on a remaining chair in the corner.

* * *

Hold it. Hang on. Leave it where it is. Reno sipped his drink, the ice making clinking sounds against the glass as his hand shook. That was _not_ supposed to happen. 

He looked around the room, his eyes meeting five different pairs of glaring ones. Bright blue, maroon, crimson, hazel and brown all gave him looks that clearly said: 'Hurt her and you're a cooked Turkey.' He swallowed hard. Of all of them, Tifa was the one he feared most, oddly enough. The men? He could handle them. Pure muscle was no match for his stamina and speed. But not only could the pretty martial artist kick his ass three times out of five, but worse, she could cut off his supply of booze. He swallowed again, watching Vincent flex his shining razor sharp claws. Maybe he should be a little more worried about the men as well… He shook his head as Tifa came around the counter, pretending to be mixing drinks across from him.

"So am I lectured now or later?" he asked. He was too tired to play dumb.

"She's young Reno," she didn't seem in the mood to beat around the bush either. "She doesn't know the kind of game you play."

"Relax, I'm not playing with her."

"Yeah right."

"I'm serious yo."

"Reno, she's a princess."

"Don't you think I know that?" He ran a hand through his hair. "I dunno, I must be drunk or somethin'. I didn't mean for that to happen." Reno the Turk did _not_ let things happen that he didn't plan.

"You haven't had that much," Tifa had memorized her regulars' drinking habits and stats. By her calculations, Reno shouldn't be tipsy for another five shots. "But you better know what you're doing. If you don't-"

"I'm a cooked Turkey?"

"If you're lucky."

He swallowed again as she walked away. Stay calm. Keep your cool. It was nothing. You never have to speak to her again… only if you don't want to…

* * *

Yuffie tried to ignore the fact that all her friends were staring at her reproachfully. What was wrong with them? She didn't do anything that anyone else wouldn't have done. She was just dancing… she didn't give him any inclination that she wanted something else. _He_ had kissed _her_ dammit! It wasn't her fault. 

Cid sat next to her, lighting up a smelly cigar.

"You saw?" she sighed, fiddling with her shoelaces.

"You don't want him," he shook his head. "You may think you do, but you don't. He isn't the type to give you the time of day unless there's somethin' in it for him. Catch my drift ninja?"

"Shove off Cid. I'm not stupid."

"Really? Oh then never mind. Apparently I'm only allowed to warn stupid people about dangerous guys."

"I know who he is thank you very much," she retorted coolly. "I can take care of myself you know. I'm the last ninja princess of Wutai. I don't go into _anything_ unarmed."

"Hell, you're armed but you ain't prepared."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"It means you've got no experience with guys like him," he crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair. "There's a difference between knowing something from a spectator's point of view and experiencing it first hand."

"Don't talk to me like I'm a little kid."

"I'm not. I'm talking to you like you're a girly who's going to get her heart broke if she ain't careful." He glared at her, tapping the ash from his cigar. "Just be careful, alright Brat?"

"You got it," she grumbled, slumping moodily in her seat.

* * *

Vincent slid silently into the seat next to Reno. 

"Come to gut me yo?"

"Why would I do that?" Vincent stared down at his glass, his crimson eyes not betraying a hint of emotion, as usual.

"For touchin the ninja," he swallowed his shot, the liquor barely touching the sides of his throat on the way down. "You and your friends seem… real pissed."

"She's young."

"So she's stupid? Listen, I'm not lookin to break her heart."

"Who said you were?"

"Well that's what you want to talk about isn't it?"

"No."

Reno didn't respond. What the hell was up with the vampiric freak?

"She puts on a strong face because she thinks it will be easier, don't let her fool you with that. It's the only way she knows how to deal with things. Don't think that because she's screaming at you, she won't cry if you say something insensitive." He took a sip of his drink. "You never go anywhere without those others," he changed the subject suddenly, inclining his head at Rude, Elena and Tseng, sulking in a corner.

"Yeah, we're a tight group yo," he shrugged, not sure he wanted to even comment about the speech Vincent had made. "Only family I've got. What about you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You and the rest," he shrugged again. "I got death in the eyes from every one of you after touchin your guys' ninja. What's up with that yo?"

"'We're a tight group'," Vincent quoted. "We don't like one of our own in danger." He didn't bother being polite. "Especially the ninja. In our family, she is the youngest. We have to look after her. You don't have one in your family like that?"

Reno frowned. He tried imagining if he saw a guy like him self hitting on Elena. Hell, he'd kill any guy who thought he had a chance with the young blond. "Point taken." He sighed, drumming his knuckles on the bar. "You don't want her getting hurt. I'm the kinda guy that does that. I get it yo. I understand. But _you_ guys don't get it. I'm not goin after her. That? That just happened. I don't know what it was, how it happened or what, but I sure as hell don't need all these warnings."

"So it won't happen again?" Reno didn't respond. He didn't care what people called him, a killer, a bastard, a sleaze. Those were all true. But he was no liar and he'd rather keep his silence than change that. "That's what I thought." Vincent set his empty glass down and got to his feet. "Oh, and if you _do_ hurt her, I _will_ gut you."

* * *

"He's a killer." 

"So are you."

"It's different."

"I don't see a difference," Yuffie scowled at Cloud's face. He seemed sickened by the Turks in general. "Relax Strife. I haven't done anything yet."

"He isn't like a normal person. Those Turks… They're trained to think you're dirt unless you're one of them. No one matters to them. If someone gets killed on their way to work, they don't even blink. He's dangerous, in more ways than one. Don't get involved." He got up, leaving to help Tifa behind the bar.

"Don't do it to yourself Brat," Barrett took Cloud's seat. "I don't care what you think. It isn't like that to him. Trust me. He's not the guy you've tricked yourself into thinking he is."

"I haven't tricked myself into thinking anything," she scowled, dangling her legs off the back of her chair and resting her chin on her knees. "We were just dancing. It's no big deal."

"You've seen how many women go with him?"

She looked down, biting her lip. "Yes."

"Good. Than you know that he doesn't think any more of you than the rest of them," Barret almost apologized at the hurt look on her face. He softened his tone. "Hey, you know we only bug you about this cuz we don't want you gettin hurt right?"

"Yeah," she stared at the floor. "I know."

"Hey kid," he patted her awkwardly on the back. "Just keep your nose clean alright? Just forget about that jackass."

"Yeah, right."

* * *

"She's falling for him," Cloud growled, handing Tifa a clean glass to fill for the next customer. 

"Yeah, I know," Tifa sighed, frowning as her eyes flicked from Reno to Yuffie. They were both sitting on opposite sides of the bar, obviously lost in thought. "You know the crazy part is I think he's falling for her too."

"No way."

"No I'm serious, look at him," she gestured at the red head, who was lighting his lighter and flicking it closed over and over again, staring dejectedly at the flame. "He's never been like that before. And he comes in here a _lot_."

"He's still dangerous," Cloud grumbled stubbornly. "I don't like this."

"Me neither."

* * *

"Screw this, I'm gettin out of here," Reno let his shot glass thunk on the bar, getting up. 

"Where are you going?" Elena asked suspiciously.

"Out for some air yo, it's hotter than hell in here. And that barmaid don't let any one smoke inside because of the kids."

"Why don't you just take off your jacket?" Her own sleeves were rolled neatly past her elbows. "And so what? It wouldn't kill you to smoke less."

"That's just not the way I operate babe," he ignored her indignant outburst, waving a hand as he left the stuffy bar, weaving through the dancers and drinkers. He inhaled the cold sharp air, letting it calm him down. Lighting a cigarette, he tried to keep his mind off a petite ninja.

"Shit… I need a drink yo," he mumbled, forgetting he had just left a bar.

"You and me both," Yuffie let the door swing shut behind her. She stood a foot or two away from him, leaning against the window. "Hey, can I have one of those?"

"No."

"What do you mean no?!"

"You don't smoke."

"So? I'm stressed! Gimme! You're not allowed to preach, you smoke like a stack."

"Yeah, that's the point," he exhaled, the puff of smoke swirling off and dispersing. "I'm already screwed. I don't want no one else to be jaded as me."

She stared at her feet. She never thought of him as the kind of guy that would even hesitate to give someone else cigarettes. What did the rest know? They sure as hell didn't know this side of him. But she sighed. But maybe they were right. Maybe, just once she should listen to her friends. Listen to reason. Getting involved with the Turk couldn't possibly end well… But what if it didn't end at all? "So what now?" she asked, looking up from her shoes.

"I dunno Princess," he sighed, cracking his neck.

"Oh come one! No smutty comment? Not even a loose innuendo?" she shook her head. "I've gotta say I'm disappointed. I walked right into that! And you've got nothing?"

He grinned, shaking his head. "Naw. Maybe I've had one helluva night and I'm too tired. The threat of disembowelment does that to a guy yo."

"Who's disemboweling you?"

"The vamp."

"Oh, so they got at you too?"

"Hell yeah."

She groaned, grinding her fists into her forehead. "They're so anal! I can't believe they think I can't take care of myself!"

"Aw, they're just worried about their lil sis, that's all yo," he remembered Vincent's comparison of Yuffie and Elena. "They're not all bad."

"But they've got no reason to be worried!" she grumbled.

He didn't look her in the eye, just stared off into space and lit another cigarette. "You don't know that."

"So are you saying I should be afraid of you?" she challenged, jutting out her chin defiantly.

"Maybe," he flicked his lighter closed with a snap. "Night Ninja. I think I'll walk home."

"What?!?!" she stormed after him indignantly. "That's it?! That's all?"

"Yeah. That's all."

"What's the big idea Turkey?"

"What big idea?" He tried to ignore her, to just keep walking, but it was difficult when she was bouncing in circles around him like one of those goddamn cats that try to trip you up when you're carrying a eighty pound box of God knows what up six flights of stairs. He shivered, remembering helping Rude move into his new apartment. God he hated cats. "And what are you doing kid?"

"Don't call me kid!" she pouted, continuing her bouncing. "The big idea is that you're leaving! You should hang out here longer! It's not even that late!"

"Drop it Brat, I'm tired yo."

"Are you leaving because of what they said? Cuz they're just being stupid!"

"No they're not."

"So that's why you're going?"

"No. I'm leaving because if I don't, _I_ might do something stupid." He stopped. He hadn't made that much progress away from the bar anyway.

"Like what?"

He smirked. "Alright now you're just askin for it."

"So what if I am?" she put her hands on her hips. "Hit me with your best shot."

"You got it Princess." And he pulled her into a kiss. Not a soft little thing like before. No, Yuffie could only compare this to the finale in an exceptionally good romance movie. Everything. Fireworks going off in your head, legs turned to jelly, the foot pop, the swoon, the works.

"Damn Turkey," she breathed when they finally broke apart. "Now we're in for it. We've probably got an audience by now." She didn't even want to turn around and see her livid friends coming to murder the Turk on the spot.

"Then lets put on a show," he mumbled against her lips. But he straightened suddenly as if coming to his senses. He cleared his throat. "I'll see you later yo." He rammed another cigarette in between his teeth and turned around, starting to leave again. This time she let him go. She knew just as well as him that if they carried on like that… well, it was better that they quit now.

"Good night Turkey!"

"Night Princess." He smiled to himself as he left. Maybe, just this once, he'd take things slow. It wouldn't kill him to get more serious in his old age. He had already passed the 'Turk Life Expectancy' that Tseng was always joking about in his grim manner. Not that the mortality rate was anything like it used to be. But still… thirty just seemed to be coming faster and faster.

She watched him go, shaking her head. She glanced guiltily back at the bar. She was sure in for it. She couldn't see her friends just now, but she knew their display couldn't have gone unnoticed. She opened the door, slipping back inside and praying that she could sneak up into an empty guest room before anyone caught her.

"Yuffie Kisaragi!!!!!"

She sighed. Too late.

**Mwahahaha. I love those two. Even if they are seriously misbehaved when I'm trying to write for them! Their minds wander int he weirdest directions... Thus the whole 'I hate cats' train of thought. Okay, I promise anyone who's waiting on updates for the drabble fest, a new chapter before next friday. Happy now? Well, I'd like reviews but I'm usually begging for them and making a fool of myself, so you know... If you really feel like it...**


	3. His Baby

**Alrighty! Well, this is really short, corny and sappy but I just couldn't help it! it sounded so cute in my head! And I was kind of experimenting with male emotions on this one, so try to be understanding (big thanks to Derek, Cory, Blake, Mike and Brandon for at least trying to teach me how guys think! Big hugs to y'all boys!). Anywho, I'm sorry I haven't been updating anything, my compy is being a butt and I can't get into Word. This frightens me to no end because that is the only place I save my stories but meh. I'll deal. I think I fixed it now any way... Btw, italics are memories of certain phrases. I think you can figure out the rest on your own. **

**Oh yeah, and a shout out to all yalls who, like me, are single and lovin it on this dreary cold and depressing Valentines Day! Boys have cooties. Stay away from them.**

* * *

"_Hey Baby, you wanna drink?"_

His line back when he picked up women at the bar.

Reno drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. That felt like such a long lime ago. Well, maybe it was. He didn't feel that much older and he sure hoped he didn't look it either. About… six years? No… it had started before that. He had fallen in love of coarse first.

"_You're lookin good Baby."_

When he started noticing the small ninja at the bar.

He smirked, thinking of the way Yuffie's eyes used to narrow when he complimented her, like she thought he was making fun or he wasn't serious. She was so cute when she was annoyed, so he tried to do that often.

"_Baby, I'm no good for you."_

What he told her to try to stop things getting too serious. That hadn't lasted long.

Reno flipped the radio on. He didn't think he was _that_ early. That was something else that had changed. He was never late or just didn't bother to show up anymore. It made him feel old to admit it, but he had matured since being with her. Well, one of them had to.

"_Love you Baby."_

What he finally told her after knowing it for so long.

He pulled out a stick of gum. Again, this was new. He had quit smoking and taken up a much healthier habit. It had been the hardest thing he'd ever done, but some things were worth the biggest struggle of his life.

"_Baby, what's wrong?"_

Before her, he could have cared less if a woman was crying.

A bell rang somewhere off in the distance. Finally. He got out of the car and slammed the door, standing around awkwardly. A few people were staring suspiciously at him from their own cars. He hadn't traded in his wild hair or earring and there was no way to rid his face of the tattoos from his youth. Some things never changed, no matter how much time had passed. He ignored the stares and stood, waiting.

He had almost decided to go looking instead when a great ball of peppy energy and scarlet pigtails rocketed across the parking lot. He grinned, crouching down and opening his arms to catch her.

"Daddy!" She almost knocked him over, jumping into his arms.

"Hey Baby, how you doin?" He smiled, picking up his baby to take her home.

* * *

**Aww, isn't the sappyness oozing out of you screen onto you keyboard? Careful, that stuff is murder to get out of the keys. Well I kinda wanted one that was more sweet and simple after the kinda sexy one last time. And of coarse, as a pairing fanatic, I always want to see my favorite couples get married and start a family. I mean, that's the eventual goal right? So it got me thinking about what it would be like with Yuffie and Reno as parents... call child services! But I started thinking about how they would change and what about them wouldn't. And the result was... VIOLA! I could have made it longer and more in depth but i was in a short drabblish mood... And I didn't put in their little girl's name because I don't really know what they would name her. Ooo! Any one know what Yuffie's mom's name was? The first person who knows it and tells me gets a... a... free prompted fic! No strings attachted. Except if theres a pairing I have to actually like it cuz other wise it would be forced and bad. If they never said her mom's name I guess I'm out of luck... but meh. I'll live. Well, I think I've succedded in making my author's not longer than my fic so...**


	4. Colored Pencil

**Yay! Two posts within twenty four hours of each other! Yay! I'm special... But yeah, okay. This one was inspired by yet more discussion with my beta, and she mentioned that I never explained why Yuffie had a colored pencil in one of my clotif stories. So here's the explanation, only way more involved and crazy!**

* * *

Yuffie slipped through the door, congratulating herself on her stealth. She set her bags down in the corner by the door. Tifa would never suspect to find her in _here_. She stifled a giggle. This was the best idea she had ever had! She peered curiously at the feet sticking out about a foot from under the covers of the bed. The ninja snuck up next to the bed, leaning over it's occupant curiously.

"It's late. You shouldn't still be asleep." She commented, poking Reno's forehead.

He groaned sleepily and an arm shot out of the blankets, wrapping around her neck and pulling her down next to him. "Just come back to bed, will ya?"

"EEWWWW!!!" she shrieked, hitting him mercilessly. He tumbled off the other side and she sprung to her feet. "What's the big idea Turk!?!?"

"What do you mean!?" He sat up from the floor, a bruise already forming on his forehead, which had made contact with the unforgiving floor. He was sure awake _now_. "What the hell are you doing in here!?"

Yuffie was mildly interested to note that he slept in his boxers. Who knew the Turks were so well built? Well, she guessed they _had_ to be, but those stupid uniforms really left _everything_ to a girl's imagination.

"Admiring the view?" he mumbled moodily, rubbing his head. He had been drinking _a lot_ last night and he could barely see straight after that little run in with the floor boards.

"No!" she snapped, throwing some blankets at him. "Cover up your scrawny ass before I puke!"

"You want me," he observed smugly, getting to his feet. "So what _are_ you doing in here?"

"Hiding from Tifa, what else?"

"What did you do this time?" he raised an eyebrow, a habit Yuffie couldn't help finding extremely attractive, even if he _was_ insulting her.

"Nothing!"

"Yeah right," he dug around in a pile of clothes on a small chair in the corner. "So then why're you afraid of her?"

"Strife's gone."

"Oh shit," Reno's eyes went wide. "I'm out of here yo." He knew just as well as she did that anyone who made the mistake of being alive when Cloud was gone automatically forfeited their freedom to unrelenting housework and verbal abuse until he returned.

"Not a chance! She's down stairs! She'll hear you try to leave." She shook her head. "Why else do you think I'm here? She won't suspect it!"

"So what am I supposed to do?" he groaned. He was already having a bad day and he hadn't even gotten dressed. He dug a hand through the pocket of his boxers and pulled out a handful of Gil. "Will you go away if I give you this?"

"No," she snatched it up anyway, counting it out and depositing it in her shorts pocket.

"Hey! Give that back! I need that for-"

She raised her eyebrow at him. "For what? Why do you have Gil in your underwear anyway?"

He didn't answer, just ignored her obvious prompting. "I need a drink…"

"Don't even think about it. She'll be waiting to jump the first person who's stupid enough to go down those stairs. And the kids are at Barrett's place so she's not afraid to bitch at everyone. Trust me. Staying in here is our safest bet."

"Alright, whatever. I'm going to get dressed," he raised an eyebrow at her suggestively. "You care to join?"

She threw a pillow at his face. "You're sick."

He laughed, closing the door to the bathroom behind him.

Yuffie looked around the room, sighing miserably. It was a good thing she had grabbed her own bags before she had come in here, Reno had nothing of interest lying around his guest room except a few empty beer bottles lying on the floor.

She sighed, tapping her foot in annoyance. She had a _very_ short attention span. She started digging through her bags, inspecting her newest clothes. She hadn't even decided what to wear them with, but she'd figure something out. Well today was a good a day as any, seeing as how she hadn't changed out of her sleeping shorts and t shirt yet. Hmm… These would go well together… She dug out a few articles of clothing and accessories.

She pulled on a loudly colored plaid skirt, slipping her shorts off once it was zipped into place. Next, she tried her newest top with it. Something was still missing… Was it the wrong color? Pattern? She frowned at her reflection and pulled off the top.

A small choke behind her made her freeze.

"Uh… Alright…" Reno's eyebrows had disappeared into his hair. "Well… I'm going to take a cold shower, and when I get out, you had better be wearing more clothes or I cannot be held responsible for my actions. Unless of coarse-"

"Sicko! Get out!" She threw all the nearest objects at her, covering her bra with her other arm. "Grossness! Out!"

"Hey it's _my_ room!" He held his arms up in front of his face protectively.

"You're only mooching off Teef and the Chocobo head!" she continued throwing things at him. "You don't even pay for your room!"

"It's still mine! I was here first you little ninja freak!"

"Just get out!"

Okay, okay," he surrendered, closing the door behind him. Yuffie shook her head. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She had completely forgotten where she was and who she was with. She was surprised the Turk hadn't tried anything on her yet. She put on her usual clothes and folded away the new items. She would have to match things up later.

Finally, when Reno returned from the bathroom, Yuffie was sitting on his bed, flipping through a magazine. She glanced up at him. He wasn't kidding about the shower, his bright red hair was slightly damp and droopy and he was only wearing a pair of black pants. She tried not to notice the scars on his chest, even if she was never the kind of girl who liked that sort of thing.

"You're weird and I hate you," she commented, turning the page and rolling her eyes.

"The feeling's mutual yo," he grumbled, shrugging on a fresh shirt. He snatched his uniform jacket from the back of the chair and dug through it's pockets. "Where…" he started searching around the room, digging through drawers and cupboards. "Where in hell are my-" he started throwing things in the air as though he thought was he was looking for was hidden under them.

"Looking for something?" She asked innocently, not looking up from her magazine.

"You haven't seen my cigarettes have you?" he ran a hand through his hair, getting more irritated by the second. He bent down, checking under the bed. "I swear… I had at least eight packs around here…"

"Oh yeah, about those…"

He stood up straight, a dangerous glint in his eyes. "What did you do Ninja?"

"I chucked 'm," she flipped the page again, blowing a bubble with her gum.

"What?"

She didn't seem to notice the low tone of voice he was using, the one that usually meant someone was about to scream and run for their lives.

"Chucked 'm. I hate cigarette smoke and I knew you'd be smoking all day."

Reno seriously considered killing her for a few moments, then thought better of it. Tifa wouldn't let him drink here and stay for free if he murdered one of her friends. "Where?" he growled, trying very hard not to wring her neck.

"Window."

He ran to the opposite side of the room, throwing open the window. Looking down, he let out an enraged roar of frustration. In a puddle of the back alley were his packs of cigarettes.

"What the hell did you do that for?!?" he rounded on her, reconsidering his decision to let her live.

"I told you, I don't like cigarette smoke," she popped her gum, scanning the prices on the latest dresses. "And you'll thank me in a few years. It won't hurt to quit."

He pulled at his hair, hoping this was all a bad dream. "Ninja, I'm _letting_ you stay in here. If you want to leave alive at the end of the day, you'll-"

"What? Climb out the two-foot window and get your cancer sticks, then climb back up the wall and give them to you? They're soaked anyway, I aimed for that rain puddle."

He kicked the bedpost, consequently breaking off his toenail and howling in pain, finally collapsing into a chair.

Yuffie tapped her toe, humming the most annoying song she knew loudly. "Hey Reno, which one do you like better?" she asked, showing him a page with two models in different dresses.

"That one," he tapped the bustier model, smirking slightly.

"Not the girl, the dress!" she rolled her eyes.

"Why the hell would I care what her dress looks like?" he raised an eyebrow at her again.

"Because I want a guy's opinion!" she huffed. "Girls don't know what guys like."

"You want a guy's opinion? Don't wear anything."

"You're gross," she leaned over, pointing out specific points on each dress. "See? This one is a little smaller, but the lines are more rigid and forbidding, don't you think? I mean, if you're going to wear something like that, you should have it smooth and inviting, right? Or is it just me and guys don't care what you're wearing, just so long as they can see your boobs?"

"The second one," he replied evenly.

"I'm talking to the wrong person here, aren't I?"

"You got it Brat."

She sighed, flopping against the pillows again. After a few minutes, her stomach growled. She hadn't had anything to eat all day except her gum, and that hardly counted… And it was almost noon! She sighed, feeling extremely sorry for herself. "I'm hungry." She whined, frowning down at her magazine.

"That sucks."

"It does," she pouted, flipping the page again. A crinkling sound finally made her look up. "What's that?" she asked, her eyes bulging at him.

"What this?" he held up the candy bar. "Nothin."

"That is not nothing Reno, that is food. I want food." She stood up, attempting to tower over him menacingly. This didn't work very well as even while he was sitting down, he was still only at eye level. She inwardly cursed the genes that made her so short.

"Really?"

"Yes. So you are going to give me food."

"Hell no," he took another bite of chocolate, making it slower and more dramatic than the last. "This is mine."

"But I'm hungry," she tried to make her voice intimidating, but it didn't seem to be working. "And I bet you've got more." She started poking him and digging in the pockets of his jacket.

"You know I'd usually be really turned on by you frisking me but-"

"Ew!" she shrieked, jumping away from him. "That is _sooooo_ gross!"

He grinned, taking another bite. "What ever you say Princess."

"Urg, never mind," she stuck out her tongue out at him. "I don't want your nasty candy anyway." She watched him out of the corner of her eye. Damn. Reverse psychology was not all it was cracked up to be. "I'm so _hungry_!" she burst out. "Can't I just have a little piece? A teensy itsy bitsy little microscopic piece that you won't even miss?"

"Okay, alright," he stuck a hand in the pocket of his trousers. So that's where he kept all the sugar. Well, forget it. She wasn't going _there_! "Here."

She caught the small sucker, glaring at him. It was one of those tiny little things that are still left a month after Halloween in the bottom of your bag. It would only make her hungrier, she just knew it. "Thanks Turkey," she grumbled sarcastically.

"Any time babe," he smirked at her and she rolled her eyes. He was so annoying. But a smile slowly spread across her face. Leave it to her genius brain to think of a way to get back at him!

"Mmm…" she carefully unwrapped the sucker. "Cherry… My favorite…" she ran her tongue slowly over it, closing her eyes. "I just love cherry." She licked her lips, cracking one eye open slightly to watch him, she saw his eyebrows shoot up. But he shook his head, turning away and taking another bite of his candy bar.

"What's your favorite flavor Reno?" she asked innocently.

"I dunno. Probably chocolate."

"Really?" she let a breath out slowly, holding the sucker by her teeth. "I don't think chocolate is that good."

"You don't say."

"Of coarse," she licked the sucker tantalizingly slow. His eyes slid over toward her, despite his obvious attempts not to watch her. "I mean, it's alright _sometimes_. But cherry… Mmmm… it's _sooooooo _good. It just never gets old…" she rolled the sucker along her lips, trying not to laugh as he gulped, shoving the remaining piece of chocolate in his mouth.

"What ever Brat, I'll just take you're word for it."

"Really?" she licked the sucker again. "It's _soooo_ good. Are you sure you don't want a taste?"

He swallowed hard, trying not to look at her. "I'm sure yo."

"Well that's too bad," she sighed, stretching. He glared at her as though he knew what she was doing. She grinned back at him, arching her back in order to crack her spine. "I would let you have a taste if you wanted."

"Oh come on brat, this ain't fair!"

"What's not fair?" she asked, trying to make her eyes wide and innocent.

He groaned, getting to his feet and pacing around with his back to her. She smiled, turning back to her magazine. This was more fun than she had thought. She learned to ignore his footfalls and just enjoy the thought that she was driving him up the wall.

"Hey these are pretty good yo."

She looked up, frowning and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw what he was holding. "Give that back!" she shrieked, throwing her magazine down and jumping to her feet.

"No, I'm not done looking," he grinned triumphantly. "I like this one." He tapped his finger on a page of her sketchbook depicting a model figure in a top that displayed an ample amount of cleavage. "Real nice."

"Give that back to me you stupid Turk!"

"Or what? You'll kick me in the shins? I'm scared." He held the sketchbook just barely out of her reach, accentuating the fact that he barely had to lift his arms to keep it from her. "How tall are you any way Ninja? Four foot five?"

"Well anyone looks short next to you!" Yuffie growled, jumping up as high as she could, trying to grab the book from his hands. He merely lifted it a few inches higher. "You're like a fricken sky scraper!"

"Right," he drawled, stepping back as she tried jumping at him again. "So do you over compensate for being so short by being so loud or is that just one of your charms?"

She ignored his taunts and punched his stomach, hoping to get him to let his guard down. This didn't go very well and she came out with a sore fist. "You were flexing," she grumbled, shaking out her hand. "Show off."

"No, just smarter than you."

"You've got a pretty big head," she commented, giving up and flopping back onto the bed. "Do you really need that hair to make it any bigger?"

"Hell yeah," he sat back down with a smug smirk, flipping through her sketchbook.

"And what's with those tattoos?" she asked, it was something she'd always wondered about.

"That's for me to know and you to forget about Princess."

She scowled at him. She hated mysteries. He sure knew every single way to tick her off.

"You know I wasn't kidding, these are good," he commented after a few moments. "I mean, not that I've got a drop of culture in me, but even I can tell these aren't bad."

"Calligraphy is an art that applies to all kinds of things," she replied sullenly. "And a princess must learn her calligraphy."

"That true?"

"No, but it's what my father says."

He remained quiet for a few minutes. For all his calling her 'Princess', he hadn't really been thinking about what that meant. That she was a highborn, foreign ball of literally _royal_ pain in the ass. He never really thought he'd be in the same room as royalty a few years ago. But that was just the way things had been going lately. He wouldn't have thought that he'd be so friendly with the AVALANCHE crew either. But here he was, upstairs in the bar built and run by those former enemies, talking to the heir to the throne of Wutai about her drawing skills. Without his smokes or any booze. Pure torture in his book.

"You sure like green," he commented after awhile, trying to distract himself from the urge to find a cigarette at all costs.

"Well it's my favorite color," she grumbled, still fuming that he had found her designs. "And I only had time to steal one pencil from Teef's little kid."

"Such a noble, up right young lady you are, stealing from children."

"Shut up."

"You've got a lot of these yo," he grinned, finally coming to the end or her drawings. "It's like you want to be a designer or something."

Yuffie stayed quiet for a few moments, making him wish he had just shut up. "People don't choose to be princesses." She stared down at her shoes, drawing her knees up under her chin. "Everyone's got _something_ they want to do."

"Sorry." What the hell was he doing? Reno the Turk did _not_ apologize for hurting someone's feelings. Hell, Reno the Turk didn't apologize for anything. But he couldn't imagine being in her position. So maybe he had grown up in the slums with nothing to eat most of his childhood, but at least he had freedom to do whatever the hell he wanted with the _rest_ of his life.

"What for?" she glared at the sheets, still not looking up.

Reno was about ready to bail, he couldn't handle emotional women. He gave an inward sigh, getting ready to do something completely uncharacteristic in order to make her either happy or angry again, he didn't really care which, just so long as she wasn't depressed anymore. "So what's the difference between these two?" he flipped to one page showing two different designs. "They look exactly the same."

"What are you talking about!?" she sprung up, crawling across the bed to point at the pictures. "Are you blind? This one's got an empire waist! Duh! And are you so stupid that you don't notice the difference between a halter and spaghetti straps?"

He shrugged, shaking his head. "All I see are two drawings of one green dress." His tactic had worked. She was so worked up about the differences she completely forgot about their previous discussion. When she paused for breath, he set the book down. "I'll take your word for it."

"You are hopeless," she huffed, picking up another magazine. She opened it to a page with the corner bent over. "I bet you don't even see the difference between these two."

Reno raised an eyebrow at her. The skirts she was pointing at were defiantly the same, he was sure of it. "No difference to see yo."

"Not the skirts, how they look on the model!" she rolled her eyes like this was obvious. "You can tell that _she_ isn't a good model." She pointed to one of them. "That's what the article's about. How different things look better on different people."

"Hey, it don't look that bad," he protested defensively. He couldn't see the difference here either. All he saw was two different women displaying their long smooth legs. "And so what? I though you said different shit looks better on some people than others."

"Not on models," Yuffie shook her head, looking disgusted. "A good model knows how to make _anything_ look good."

"Yeah right."

"I'm serious!" she set the magazine aside and hopped off the bed. "Here, I'll show you."

"Wait- what? Where are you going?"

"It'll only take me a second," she assured, digging through the drawers of the small dresser in the corner.

"What are you doing? That's my shit!"

"I know, I'm proving a point," before he could jump to his feet and stop her, she had gathered an armful of clothing and had slipped into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. He jiggled the doorknob.

"Open the door Brat! Give me my shit back!"

"No, I'm almost done." Her voice sounded slightly muffled behind the door. "Just wait a second Turkey."

He ran a hand through his hair. Forget feeling bad for her, she was as good as dead. What was she thinking? She'd probably ruin his uniform. He could just see Rufus's face if he told him he needed a new spare set of clothes because a fashion crazed ninja had gone crazy with the scissors. There was a click and the door opened.

"See? Told you I could pull it off."

And she had pulled it off. Very well he might add. She had solved the size problem by rolling his sleeves past her elbows and cuffing his pants up to Capri length. She had left the bottom half of his shirt unbuttoned and had tied the loose ends in a knot just above her navel and cinched his belt as tight as it would go around her small hips. He tried not to stare and simply grinned at her.

"Alright, point taken," he shook his head. "You look good in my clothes, you should wear them more often."

"Shut up," she stalked past him and flopped back on the bed, picking up her sketchbook and the green colored pencil. "They're comfy though, I'll give you that."

"Yeah, Turks got it better than them SOLDIERs in the uniform department," he admitted. If anyone had tried to force him to wear purple, his EMR would have done the talking. "What are you doing now?" he couldn't help being curious.

"Coming up with something new," she chewed the pencil. "I've finished making all my old stuff."

"Wait- you mean you actually make all that stuff you draw?" he stared incredulously at her. This ninja had way more time on her hands than he originally thought.

"Of coarse! What would be the point if I didn't?"

"I dunno. What's the point of making them if you never wear them?"

"Well be quiet a minute," she ordered, ignoring the question. "I'm trying to think."

He sighed, tapping his foot in a fast, almost vibratory rhythm. He _really_ needed a smoke. It was almost two o'clock and Reno hadn't had a cigarette all day. His hangover wasn't helping at all either. He could feel sweat on his face, not because of the room's temperature even if he had just noticed it was rather stuffy. He flicked his lighter open and closed a few times, then shrugged off his jacket. After a few more minutes of silence he got to his feet and stuck his head out of the window in order to get some air.

"What are you doing Turkey?"

"Nothin yo."

"You look sick."

"Yeah, maybe."

"What's wrong with you?" she asked suspiciously. "You don't look good at all."

He glanced at the mirror in the corner. She was right. He looked pale under his tan and his face was shining with sweat. His eyes looked blood shot and feverish. "Well maybe if you hadn't thrown out my smokes I would look a little better," he growled, running a hand through his hair for the umpteenth time that day. He strode into the bathroom and turned on the cold water in the sink, sticking his head under the faucet.

"Wow, I didn't know you'd get withdrawals that fast," she commented, still drawing.

"Well now you know," he felt sick. "Urg… this is hell…"

"Join the club, it's called PMS."

He groaned again, immersing his face in the ice-cold water that filled the sink.

"Wow. You're going to take that? Even I admit that was low. You _must_ be sick." She shook her head and stood up, wandering into the bathroom. "Alright, I guess this is partly _my_ fault."

"Damn straight!" he glared at her. "It's _all_ you fault!"

"Well not really, you're the one who started smoking in the first place," she pointed out, digging through the medicine cabinet. There was nothing too strong in there but Tifa always kept the guest rooms stocked with a few simple bottles of generic medication. "Alright… we got cough drops, Tums, Vicks, cough syrup and… Aha! Aspirin! You may kiss my feet in gratitude now." She held out the small bottle triumphantly.

He snatched it from her, shaking out a handful of pills.

"Not that many you moron!" she scrambled to stop him. "You're going to kill yourself!" She grabbed his arm, trying to pry open his hand.

"Shove off Brat! I feel like shit so I take a shit load of meds, that's the way it works!"

"No-it-isn't!" she grunted, grappling with him without much progress. "You're only supposed to take like, three at the most!"

"Whatever Brat," he lifted his arm, attempting to shake her off. But she was clinging to him like a leech. "Get off yo!

"No! Not until you put at least half of those back!"

"No deal Princess," despite his pounding head ache, his unsatisfied cravings for nicotine and alcohol, and the fact that she was the most irritating person he had ever met, he couldn't help but laugh. She looked so comical when she was angry. Like a child having a tantrum, pouting lip and all. He could easily lift her off the floor with his one arm.

"Hey! What are you doing Turkey?!" she shrieked in a high-pitched voice. "Put me down!"

"Let go and I won't be holding you up," he pointed out calmly, grinning mischievously at her. "Just give it up, I can keep this up all day." He exited the bathroom and wandered around the room to demonstrate, not neglecting to try and scrape her off on the furniture. "You know, you don't weigh that much. This isn't even a decent workout."

"Oh please," she scoffed with as much dignity as she could manage in her current position. "I can keep this up _way_ longer than you."

"Is that a challenge Princess?"

"You know it Turkey."

"Fine," he shook his arm as hard as he could, turning in a tight circle at top speed. "Giving up yet?"

"Not a chance," she tried to keep her eyes focused, no matter how dizzy she was.

"Good." But his arm was getting tired. He tried holding it at all angles in the hope that she would simply slip off. Finally, with a grunt of effort, he lifted his arm straight up in the air, inadvertently bringing their faces less than an inch from each other.

Yuffie squirmed slightly, trying not to look him in the eyes. She had always been a sucker for green eyes. She was about to crack a joke or start yelling at him to break the tension… but that was before he pulled her even closer with his free arm, crashing their lips together.

The handful of pills scattered over the floor, completely forgotten. Yuffie's arms slid around his neck and she made a mental note to convince him to cut off his ponytail. It got in the way. How annoying… Maybe she'd just sneak up behind him with a scissors some day… he probably wouldn't even notice anyway. Despite this, plus the fact that her legs were going numb from swinging so freely for so long, Yuffie was quite enjoying herself. That was, until the door opened.

"Um…"

He jumped and Yuffie almost fell as she was dropped back onto her feet.

"Oh hi Denzel!" she smiled brightly. "Looks like you and Marlene are back from Barrett's…"

"Yeah… What are you doing?" The boy looked mildly confused.

"I'll tell you when you're older kid," Reno smirked, closing the door. "Think he'll talk?"

She looked up at him slyly. "Who cares? It'll take him awhile probably…"

He grinned, picking her up again. "I like the sound of that Princess."

* * *

"What do you want for dinner?" Tifa asked, much more calm than she had been all day now that she had the children to distract her.

"I dunno," Denzel shrugged.

"Oh, by the way, have you seen Yuffie? I haven't seen her all day and I know she slept here last night."

"Yeah, she was in one of the guest rooms with Reno."

"What!?"

* * *

**Hahahaha... Me so mean to those guys. I wrote Reno's withdrawals when I was sick to take out my frustration. I end up doing that alot. So any stories in which I hurt him and stuff, you can tell I'm having a bad day. Well, read and review!**


	5. One Week

**Okay... so sorry for the slow updates again... I got no excuses... EXCEPT FINALLY BEING THE PROUD OWNER OF ONE FOURTH OF FINAL FANTASY VII AT LONG, LONG LAST!! ehem anyway... don't ask about the 'one fourth' part... so... The easter bunny left you a reffie! It's only loosely based on the song, FYI. But I think it kinda works for them. Oh yeah, and I took out the random nonsensical jabber verses because Oo how the heck are you supposed to make sense out of that! Anyway...chucks fic and runs**

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* * *

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It's been one week since you looked at me  
Cocked your head to the side and said "I'm angry"  
Five days since you laughed at me saying  
"Get that together come back and see me"  
Three days since the living room  
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you  
Yesterday you'd forgiven me  
but it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry

Reno threw his keys on the counter, kicking his shoes off into the side of the oven, ensuring a great racket. He let the bottles and jars in the refrigerator clatter and rattle as he wrenched the door open. A roar of frustration met his ears, making him smirk as he opened the last milk carton.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"What? No 'welcome home Baby! How was your day?' I'm hurt," he commented dryly, meeting her angry gaze levelly.

"You. Are. An. Ass." Yuffie growled, using all of her five feet and three inches to lean imposingly toward him. "And I'm _still_ mad at you."

"Really? Hadn't noticed Babe, sorry. I've only been sleeping on the couch for what? A week?" he raised his eye brows and drank straight out of the milk carton.

She wrinkled her nose in disgust. "So?" she tapped her foot impatiently, crossing her arms. "Are you going to apologize?"

He set the milk down and looked her in the eye seriously. She seemed to relax slightly under his stare and her glare softened. He took a step closer and bent slightly so that their noses were less than an inch apart. Her mouth reluctantly began to form a smile. Reno leaned even closer and she closed her eyes expectantly, waiting for the kiss.

"No."

He straightened up and strode away, lighting a cigarette on the way to the couch, where he flopped down and put his feet up on the coffee table.

Yuffie let out a frustrated shriek of rage and slammed the door to the bedroom. Moments later, deafening music blared from the other room. Reno merely smirked and turned up the volume on the television.

**How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad  
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad  
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral  
Can't understand what I mean?  
Well, you soon will  
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve  
I have a history of taking off my shirt**

"You're so immature!" she screamed, nearly ripping the door off it's hinges as she stormed out again.

"What was that? Sorry, can't hear ya Princess, TV's too loud yo."

"You think that if you wait it out, I'll just give up or something!" she roared. "Well sorry Mr. 'I can live with you hating me' but that is _so_ not how this is going to go. I want an apology, and I'm _getting_ one! No matter how long it takes!" She stomped into the kitchen, clanking things around.

"What're you doin?" he craned his neck over the back of the couch, watching her suspiciously.

"Sorry, I'm not speaking to you," she sang out, lifting a six-pack of beer and letting it thunk heavily on the counter.

"Hey- Princess," he sat up a little straighter. "That's my booze- what are you doin-"

"I wish someone would tell my boyfriend that I am not speaking to him," she declared, opening each can of cheap alcohol with the flick of a manicured nail. When the tabs were all flipped, she lifted the entire six-pack and dumped the beer into the sink.

"Oh no you-" Reno vaulted over the back of the couch. "You did not just-" he raced across the living room, groaning as the last of his precious drink swirled down the drain.

"Awe… it looks like he's upset," she observed, her hands triumphantly planted on her hips. "Maybe a nice, beautiful, smart and innocent Ninja Princess would go and get him more booze if he said he was sorry for being such an ass to her.

"Keep dreamin Brat," he ruffled her hair, something she hated. She scowled up at him and stamped on his foot with all her might… and three inch heels.

"Shit!"

**It's been one week since you looked at me  
Threw your arms in the air  
and said "You're crazy"  
Five days since you tackled me  
I've still got the rug burns on both my knees  
It's been three days since the afternoon  
You realized it's not my fault  
not a moment too soon  
Yesterday you'd forgiven me  
And now I sit back and wait till you say you're sorry**

"So…" he crossed his arms, staring her down. "You figured out I didn't lie to you huh?"

"Don't make me mad again," she grimaced. "You're still not off the hook yet Turkey."

"Really?" he raised his eyebrows at her. "I dunno Yuf, I'm feelin pretty hookless right now."

"Shut up," she narrowed her eyes at him. "I still haven't forgiven you. You've got a _lot_ of begging ahead of you. And I mean a _lot,_ before I even _think_ of forgiving you."

"Well that's too bad," he shrugged, putting out his cigarette on the arm of her favorite chair. She screamed with rage.

"You are insane you stupid, huge-ass, loser excuse for a man!" she cried, stamping her foot like a child having a tantrum. "I shouldn't even be here anymore! Any one with half a brain would have left you months ago!"

"Well you know what that means Princess," he shrugged unconcernedly. "You ain't got half a brain."

She screamed with fury again. Several dogs barked somewhere off in the distance. When she ran out of air, she stood staring at him, breathing heavily. Before Reno could even react in any way, she had closed the distance between them and tackled him to the ground, nearly knocking the breath from his lungs as she kissed him ferociously.

"So I'm feelin pretty off the hook right now-"

"Shut up," she mumbled, her fingers working steadily down the buttons of his shirt.

**How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad  
Tryin' hard not to smile though I feel bad  
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral  
Can't understand what I mean?  
Well, you soon will  
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve  
I have a history of losing my shirt**

"You, Princess, are way too predictable," he informed her, tracing a finger up and down her spine.

"Stop that," she scowled up at him. "It _tickles_." She buried her face in his shoulder, ignoring his laugh. "And I'm still mad. It's just too cold when you aren't here at night."

"You keep telling yourself that babe."

"I hate you."

"Yeah, I hate you too," he frowned, twisting a bit of her short black hair between his fingers. "Why is it that I hate you again?"

"Mmm…" she mumbled sleepily, her humming lips tickling his collarbone. "I don't remember. You?"

"Naw," he paused. "I've got rug burn."

"Yeah me too," she giggled, lifting her head to look at him.

"That would be _your_ fault I think," he pointed out, poking her hard in the side.

"Ouch!" she squeaked, sitting up straight and making him laugh at her again. "You're not nice and I'm still mad at you."

"Yeah me too," he grinned, pulling her down next to him again.

**It's been one week since you looked at me  
Dropped your arms to your sides  
and said "I'm sorry"  
Five days since I laughed at you and said  
"You just did just what I thought you were gonna do"  
Three days since the living room  
We realized we're both to blame,  
but what could we do?  
Yesterday you just smiled at me  
Cause it'll still be two days till we say we're sorry**

"So you're not apologizing?" she narrowed her eyes at him across the table.

"No way," he ignored her stare and folded his toast in half, shoving the whole thing in his mouth. "I don't think I should, with you bein so damn mean lately."

"Well you started it!" she complained, pouting. "When you're ready to say you're sorry, I'll be right here."

"Right… I'll remember that," he shrugged on his jacket and took his keys from the counter. "See ya Princess." He made a move to leave.

She sighed heavily, rolling her eyes. "Okay fine… Reno, I'm sorry I didn't trust you and I've been bitchy to you for the past week. There, I said it first, happy now?"

"No," he grinned, saluting her on his way out of the door. "Oh, and you still owe me a six pack." He reminded her, shutting the door and smiling as a shriek of anger was only slightly muffled by the wall between them.

He counted slowly to five before he opened the door again. "Yuf," he crossed the room and kissed her, nearly lifting her off her feet. "I'm sorry."

She tried to sneer but failed. "So are we still fighting?"

He shrugged. "I dunno, your call this time."

"Well I'm going to say we are," she nodded decisively. "I mean, I'm still pretty mad."

"Really?" He raised his eyebrows, feigning concern.

"Yeah," she nodded seriously. "And besides," her lip twitched. "You're a lot better looking when I hate you," she stated matter-of-factly.

"Is that so?" He raised his eyebrows at her, pulling her into another kiss. His hands slid down her waist, but Yuffie was too distracted to notice until he straightened up, dangling the handful of gil that had formerly lay safely in her back pocket in front of her face. "This is for my booze." And he turned on his heel and left before she could try to steal it back.

**It'll still be two days till we say we're sorry**

He was halfway down the stairs of the apartment building before she caught up with him. Hearing her come up behind him, he grinned and turned just in time so that she didn't have the space to react as he swept her up yet again. She nearly sent him stumbling off the landing as she leapt into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. He regained his balance, leaning against the wall to prevent any future danger of falling down the stairs.

"The hell you think yer doin?" A voice interrupted them.

"Oh hi Mrs. Fields!" Yuffie chirped brightly, taking one arm from around Reno's neck to wave at the old woman.

"Ya can't do that here!" the widow glared at them from behind her thick glasses, waving a threatening finger at them. "I ought to inform the land lord, what with the shoutin and screamin at all hours!"

"Sorry," Reno grinned, craning his neck around Yuffie to see her. "Won't happen again."

Mrs. Fields flapped an annoyed hand at the both of them and turned away, mumbling something about 'fool kids too damn hot for each other to keep it in private. Back in my day, people caught tonguing each other all over the place got sent off to war! As was proper for them kinda folk…'.

The moment her door snapped shut, Yuffie turned back, trying to stifle a giggle.

**It'll still be two days till we say we're sorry**

"So where were we again?"

She frowned, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "I don't remember…"

"Well it's a good thing I do," he grinned, hitching her up by her legs.

Yuffie wondered how it was possible for someone to still be grinning when they kissed. She would have to ask him how he did that.

Later.

When they finally broke apart, she slid down him back onto her feet, skipping ahead down the stairs to a landing several floors below.

"You're way too predictable Turkey," she taunted, raising the fistful of gil to show him she had retrieved it from the inside of his jacket. A plain black hair tie stood out against her pale wrist and she grinned foolishly as a pair of too-big sunglasses slid down her nose.

Reno ran a hand through his hair, grimacing at the lack of shades on his forehead and unusually loose feel of the longer length of hair at the back of his neck. "Gimme my shit back Yuf."

"But I like these," she smiled evilly, drumming her fingers on the side of his glasses. "They're _so_ retro."

"I don't care what they are, I need 'm back!"

"For what?" she giggled. "Shading my shining magnificence so as not to blind yourself?"

He smirked, slowly stalking his way down the stairs. "You wish Babe."

"Tell you what," she rocked back and forth on her heels, pretending to think hard. "I'll give you your stuff back… later tonight. And only if you're a good boy."

He grinned. "I think I can do that."

"Really? I dunno… You're not that nice. You really think you can pull off behaving yourself for once?"

"Who said anything about behaving?" And he snatched the gil back, vaulting over the railing to the stairwell below. He smiled as he ran out of the building. Wondering what horrors were in store for him when he returned. He was looking forward to whatever she came up with.

**Mwahahaha... Okay, this was my first attempt at them together already. It was different, but I think I like it. They are just way too much fun to play with! I got this weird deje vu (sp?) thing when i was writing, so I'm really sorry if I stole something and just didn't notice. Yeah, it got kinda random there towards the end, my mind was starting to wander. Thus the weirdo cat lady. Anywno, please review! they make me oh so happy, even if I haven't the time to reply to every single one!**


	6. Celebration

**I have an excuse this time! I swear! Y'all ready for this one? It's a dusey! My beta was in California for two weeks. There. And I have had little or no inspiration for over a month so... yeah... I had to take advantage of the spark I got for one day and write this. It's not up to my usual, in my opinion, but I feel uber bad for not updating anything in so long... So I'm sorry and I promise I will get back to my usual self eventually. This takes place right after the movie. And I mean _right_ after. Warning: Brief Clotif ahead! (swoon)**

* * *

"It's cured! It's cured!"

"Mommy, I don't hurt anymore!"

"It's a miracle!"

"That Strife and Avalanche did it again, huh?"

Everyone in the church was celebrating, jumping up and down and shouting their joy. Yuffie was right at the center of the noise as usual, screaming out war cries and punching the air.

Most people were too busy to notice the blond man in the water reach up and pick up the blushing barmaid by her waist, setting her down in the shallow water in front of him. Yuffie saw Cloud whisper something in Tifa's ear. The woman's face broke into a beaming smile and she jumped into his arms, kissing him until he was red to the roots of his spikes.

"Way to go!"

A few people catcalled or wolf whistled.

"Bout time you two!" Barret roared cheerfully.

Yuffie rolled her eyes. "Get a room already! Gawd!" and she cannon balled into the deepest part of the pool, ignoring the fact that her knee-high shoes would most likely never be the same.

"Yuffie!" Tifa shrieked as she was soaked by the splash. Cloud laughed, trying to shake his sopping bangs from his eyes. "Get over here right now!"

"No!" the ninja giggled. "I'm not letting you kill me for wrecking your moment! That's like, my job!" She jumped out of the water and pushed her way through the crowd before Tifa could follow. "Look out! Hero of the planet, coming through! Party at Teef and Spikey's!"

Another cheer went up as she ran from the church, grinning from ear to ear.

"You're happy," someone commented at her elbow.

"Hey Turkey!" she beamed up at Reno, who was raising an eyebrow at her. "Oh-" she looked down and noticed that she must look quite funny, soaked to the bone and dancing in the middle of the streets of Edge. "I went swimming!" She informed him brightly.

"I can see that yo."

"You should go in there! It's crazy! Everyone's all freaking out about being cured, and Spike's makin out with Tifa in the water and all that. That's got to be a sin or something right? Making out in a church? Oh well, I'll ask Vinny later. But it's totally awesome!" She caught her breath, the excitement of the day still coursing through her. "And now there's gunna be a party at the bar, cuz this is the second time we saved the world! It's like, a record or something!"

He shook his head, grinning. "Do you ever shut up?"

"No! Never!" she smiled cheekily at him. "Do you ever get excited about anything good?"

He shook his head, his eyes glancing pointedly up and down her body. "Nothin you'd be interested in…"

"Pft! So we just saved the world from like, all the baddies, and all you can think about is that my shirt's wet enough to see through?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Well we'll just have to get you partying, then you'll be more fun," she assured the Turk, dragging him by his arm in the direction of the bar. He winced, slowing down behind her and putting a hand to his ribs.

"You okay? Anything broke?"

"It's fine yo," he grinned, ruffling her wet hair. "Just got hit too many times in one day. Nothin I ain't used to."

"Don't _do_ that," she scowled, smoothing her bangs back from her face. "It's all annoying and weird. How come you haven't been around lately?" She almost said 'I've missed you,' but decided against it. Their 'not-so-relationship-thing', as she called it, wasn't sappy and sickly sweet enough to say the cliché lines of a true romance.

"Been keepin the boss alive," he shrugged, grimacing slightly. He pulled a cigarette and lighter from his jacket pocket, lighting the small white stick and taking a deep drag. "And all that Jenova shit. Don't see what the big deal was. But it's the job."

"Well you're going to hang out here a bit, right? I mean, things have been kinda boring with all the angsting and stuff on Spike's part. And then Teef bein all depressed when he's gone. But I guess they'll probably be loads better now. But still!"

"Yeah sure. For a little bit."

Yuffie frowned. He wasn't meeting her eyes. "What's your problem Turkey? You're all serious and stuff."

"Just been thinkin," he looked down at her, smiling slightly.

"No way!" she gaped at him exaggeratedly. "I didn't know you could think!"

"Aw shut it yo," he grinned around the cigarette, shoving her lightly. "You know what I mean."

"Well what are you thinking about?" she demanded. "You _so_ have to tell me, I mean, I'm like, practically sorta almost kinda your girlfriend. That's got to count for something."

"Well, as practically sorta almost kinda your boyfriend, I'm gunna say a guy's gotta keep a couple secrets."

"Come _on_!" she whined, stamping her foot and twisting in mock agony. "Tell me! I'm gunna die from being all kept out of your fat, weirdo looking head!"

"Alright fine," he shook his head, laughing at her antics. "I was just thinkin bout if I'm the good guy or the bad guy, ya know?"

"Uh- not really," she snorted. "Why're you thinking about that kinda stuff? That isn't really you."

He shrugged and winced again. "I uh-" he paused, giving way to a stream of coughing. "I dunno. Just kinda thinkin I don't want to be remembered as the bad one in the story."

"You sure you're okay?" she frowned; trying to remember if she'd ever heard him cough before. "You should _so_ quit smoking. I bet that's why you're coughing. Then you wouldn't smell like crap either! It would be totally awesome!"

"Aw shut it yo," he waved a hand at her. "I ain't listenin to any more of that kinda shit. I get enough from Lena and the guys."

"Well they're right."

He rolled his eyes. "Don't give me that, Brat."

"Fine," she crossed her arms stubbornly. "Then I have made the decision for the rest of the world!" she declared. "You're a bad guy!"

He raised an eyebrow. "Cuz I smoke?"

"Exactly!" she nodded firmly. "The only way you can save yourself is to quit, right here and now!"

"Fine," he grinned and flicked his cigarette off into a puddle on the sidewalk. "There. So am I the good guy now?"

"No! You have to quit forever! Not just for today!"

"Okay," he shrugged and dumped his pockets, relieving them of their half empty packs, loose matches and spare lighters. "Done Brat."

She tried not to look shocked and worried at the alarming amount of smoking paraphernalia that the Turk kept on his person. "Sweet! That was way easy to get you to quit!" She chirped, even though she didn't doubt he would be lighting up again within the hour. "So was that it? Are you going to be fun again now cuz I have officially labeled you a good guy?"

He started to laugh, but it only made him cough again. "Maybe. I dunno Princess, I'm a little tired."

She rolled her eyes, bouncing in circles around him. "How can you be tired? We just had like, the biggest crisis since meteor! You should be as pumped as me!"

"You never quit, do you?"

"Never!" she cried dramatically, punching the air a few times. "Do you really need to ask?" They were almost to the bar, walking slowly down a deserted short cut.

He snorted. "Keep it up Brat. I ain't gunna put up with you any more than I have to."

"Pft, yeah right! You know I'm the only girl who'll put up with _you_!" She skipped ahead of him, wiggling her hips. "You're _so_ lucky to have me you know."

"Right… Well, I guess there's _some_ advantage to lovin a ninja chick with legs like that."

She stood still a moment, letting his words sink in. Finally, her face broke into an evil smile. "What was that Turkey boy?" she called loudly, skipping to catch up with him. "Did the cold hearted jack ass of the Turks just tell the beautiful Shinobi Princess of Wutai that he loves her? I think you might have to repeat that, so I can make sure I got it right."

"Shut up," he smirked, sticking out his foot to trip her. She hopped over it easily. "Ya don't gotta brag."

"Yeah I do!" she planted her hands on her hips proudly. "I'm such a miracle worker! I should get a medal!" She poked his shoulder hard. "And maybe, if you're like, super lucky, not to mention worship me for the rest of your life, I might love you too."

"You wish," he snorted.

"Okay, so maybe you'll just be really super lucky."

"That's good to know," he grinned and ruffled her hair again. They were only a block away from the bar and the crowds were already milling towards Tifa's Seventh Heaven. "Hang on a second. I'll be in there in a minute."

"Okay!" she giggled and stood on tiptoe, kissing his cheek. "And be like, _so_ ready to party cuz I'm not going to be sleepy for hours!"

"Sure. Bye Yuffie." He watched he skip inside, laughing and joking with everyone around her.

She thought that maybe she might be able to get a room all to themselves if she locked one right now before any one else tried to stay the night. She grinned at the idea.

Reno turned around, wandering off in the opposite direction. That had gone better than he had thought originally. He slid a hand into his jacket and felt the stub of rib protruding from his chest and the blood flowing sluggishly from the tear it made in his skin. He watched the people laughing and dancing around, making their way happily to the bar.

Reno grinned as black started eating away at the edges of his vision and his knees buckled. No doubt Yuffie would hate him forever for not telling her, but there was nothing she could do to him anymore.

* * *

**(Hides from ferocious Reno fangirls) Yes, yes I just killed off one of my favorite characters of all time, so sue me, I was desperate. Like I said, not my usual. But still. I had to experiment. I mean, that's what fanfics are for, right? Well the way I see it, Reno and Rude get the crap kicked out of them by Loz and Yazoo, and walk away smiling at the end of the movie right? Well, Just thought I'd mess with what would happen if Reno wasn't so fine and dandy after all that bangin around. And I'm sorry if the moments and romance were cheesy and ooc. Curse Reno and his too-cool-to-be-mooshy-ness...**

**As always, read and review! I'd love to hear what y'all think!**


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